Walt Disney World, Part One

We are back from Walt Disney World just over 24 hours and the adjustment to reality has not been easy!  Mom and Dad could use a few days on a beach to recover from the week-long marathon, and the kids are suffering from "Post Disney Letdown Syndrome" which causes random fits of hysterical crying and falling on the floor upon realizing that the magic of the Magic Kingdom can't last forever.

Ben is the only one with some sense - he says "I was happy to be at Disney World, and I'm happy to be home too!"  He slept for 12 hours last night!  We didn't catch more than 8 a night the whole time we were away, and the poor kid was like the walking wounded by the end of the trip (heck, he was a zombie by day two, who am I kidding?!)

Now that we've been there and done that, we know that there is simply TOO MUCH fun to be had at WDW, and even with me devising pared down, priority-only to-do lists, we still tried to fit more than we should have into the seven days.  It bit us hard a few times - lesson learned!

But in the end, it's probably better to try too hard and fall on your face a few times than not try hard enough.  The kids will certainly remember this as the vacation of a lifetime - they are already devising ways to save money so we can go back!

Here is our Disney Retrospective, in pictures of course!

DAY ONE:

Goodbye Illinois, Hello Orlando!

 

 

Daddy sprung for a limo to take us to the airport. 

The kids were mighty impressed.

 

 

They wasted no time becoming accustomed to luxury.

Molly stretched out to take a nap and Jack poured himself a champagne flute of water to drink.

 

 

We had such a bad experience with JetBlue last time, that we flew United this time.  Only they pulled the same stunt!  We got on the plane, backed away from the gate on time, and then were informed that there was a mechanical problem.  After a 20 minute delay, we had to go back to the gate, deplane, and wait an hour until it was fixed. 

 

Lucky for us, Daddy is a fancy schmancy club member with United, so we got to spend that time in their swanky lounge with fun snacks.

 

 

 

Munchkin-Pops!

(the kids devised this idea themselves by sticking coffee stirrers in their donuts)

 

 

Finally, we re-boarded, and in the blink of an eye (two hours later) we were in sunny Florida!

 

 

 

We were in the Hawaii building of the Polynesian Resort. 

The accomodations were nothing to write home about, but the amenities can't be beat!!

 

We had just enough time to unpack (Mom)

take a quick dip in the pool (Dad and kids)

eat a quick room service pizza

and get ready for the night's festivities.

 

 

We got to the park just in time for the Parade!

 

This here is Pre Vizsla from Star Wars the Clone Wars, 

minus the mask that we thought might not make the trip in one piece,

 or the light saber that wouldn't fit into the suitcase. 

 

 

I don't think Jack is invested in the character - he is kind of evil after all.

But he had the coolest accessories, and Jack had birthday money to burn.

He also has a sense of direction to burn, because he got himself lost not ten minutes after walking into the park.  Luckily, he was found a few minutes later, andwas  properly admonished into pretending that he wasn't an independent adult for the evening.
(don't get me wrong, he still THINKS he's an independent adult, he just decided to pretend he wasn't so we'd stop nagging and harassing him).
 

The little guy below, most 30-somethings will know well.

 

 

He's a Ghostbuster!

 Looking for some ghosts to bust, he's totally in the right place.

 

(as for how this costume came about - there was a commercial last Halloween featuring a two second clip of the Ghostbusters.  He was obsessed instantly.  I've gone only as far as letting him research costumes and watch the music video and movie trailers.  Even without ever seeing the actual movie, he is still 100% committed to his Ghostbuster fandom.)

 

 

Apparently, when they're not fighting Slimer, Ghostbusters like to dance the night away!

 

 

This is our little Pheonix, thanks to Nana and Papa's Christmas gift from last year.

She coveted the Chasing Fireflies costume so badly that many, many tears were shed when Mommy would not pay for such extravegance.

 

When she opened up that box on Christmas Day, she was in orange, feathered heaven!

 

This Halloween, she finally has the chance to be the Pheonix she's always dreamed of....

she didn't even complain that the costume or feather wig itched!

 

 

Here comes the parade!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 The park was jam packed for the event, and admittedly, we were kind of wiped out from the day of travel.  But we managed to score at a few of the candy stations around the park and even saw a few of our favorite characters along the way.

 

The park was so amazing at night, all dressed up for Halloween

And the fireworks did not disappoint...well, at least they didn't disappoint ME....the kids were slightly offended by the noise since they were half asleep at that point!

 

 

 

 

And then it was really time to call it a night.

 

 

We said goodbye to the Magic Kingdom...

 

 

...hopped a Ferry across the lake to our hotel...

 

 

...and Pre Vizsla surveyed his domain as we set sail for the shore.

 

  

Despite a few hiccups, a good day was had by all.

 

Birthday Wish List!

People (meaning Marc and a few loving family members) are always asking what I want for my birthday.  Admittedly, I'm pretty terrible at making a list, because in all honesty, I have more blessings than I could ever dream of and trying to think up things I want on top of all that goodness kind of makes me feel kind of greedy.

 

But you only turn 40 once! 

 

 So I'm trying to turn over a new leaf, because if I'm not careful, I'll quickly turn into my parents who always tell us, "We don't need anything!" when we beg them for ideas for birthdays and anniversaries.  Of course they don't *need*  anything, but if they don't come up with an idea or two, then Mum is going to get a picture of the kids, and Dad is going to get Omaha Steaks or a plaid flannel shirt...for the 112th time and counting.

 

So here's my best attempt at a wish list, ranging from the totally cheap and easy, to the laughably over-the-top.  I'll have you know it's taken a whole lot of brain power to come up with these things - I've been keeping notes for six months!  So it counts as my Christmas list too.  And anniversary.  And any other random holiday that crops up for the next few years.

 

 

Starbuck's Gift Cards....$1 and up

 

A thrice weekly indulgence of mine...that I always feel slightly guilty about because honestly, I can make coffee at home if I take four seconds to do so, you know?  That's ten dollars I could be saving for something important, or giving to someone less fortunate. 

(I'm even feeling guilty right now)

But gosh, it just tastes so GOOD when they make it!

Better Homes and Gardens Magazine  ...$5.99

I'm a sucker for this magazine - always have been and always will be!

Midwest Living Magazine...$15.00

I swear this magazine has to be made by the same people at BHG.  It's just as good, PLUS it's midwest-specific!  It's helped me make a grand bucket list of fun adventures for us to go on while we're lucky to be Midwesterners via transplant.  And it's made me appreciate what a beautiful region we live in.

Phat Strap...$28.95

 

I adore my current Phat strap, and have used it for so long that it's starting to get Ring-Around-The-Collar!  I want to take it off and wash it, but I need a backup to put on while the original drip-dries.

Enter this gray chevron and aqua minky dot beauty...

it's got my name written all over it!

 

 

Let The Children Come by Liz Lemon Swindle...$75.00

 

 

 

 

This image was hanging over the kitchen table at the home where I attended a Power of Moms retreat last April. I haven't been able to get it out of my mind. How can you look at this picture, titled "Let the Children Come" and not hear the laughter or feel the love for children in Christ's heart?

I want my kids to know Him like that.

And in true, serendipitious fashion
(I love how the Lord has a knack for that)
the gospel in church this week was Mark 10:2–16

"...Let the children come to me and don’t stop them,
for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these"

 

Interior Car Detailing Service...$99.00

 

My 2004 Nissan Quest has seen 8 years of abuse and she's still ticking like clockwork!

She's dinged and scratched and not looking her best on the outside, but we mostly spend time looking at the inside...which admittedly, also needs some help.  Particularly since the raspberry sorbet incident of this past summer...which coincided with the great Spot Bot failure of 2012.  Not a good combination!  A full detailing is a necessity before baby comes.

 

 

Kara Vita Skincare...$131.75

 

Having lost 50lbs over the last 3 years, I found out that there is a side benefit to being plump - it keeps your wrinkles filled in!  I had hoped I was just one of those lucky people that doesn't age, but alas, now that the weight is gone, the crows's feet are making their debut.

 

My neighbor Kris is 38 and looks like she's 12.

She uses this skincare line.

That's enough of a testimonial for me!

 

 

Sonicare Toothbrush...$136.99

 

I had my first crown put on a few months ago (no root canal needed thank goodness), and I want it to be my LAST! I don't think it would be fair for me to have a snazzy toothbrush and poor Marc be left to suffer with a cheapo bristle brush, so this model has two of everything!

 

Tamron 18-200mm Lens...$249.00

 

 

No matter how devoted I am to my nifty fifty, I need an all purpose zoom lens that is lightweight, multifunctional, and dependable.  When our friends Malena and Fede visited from Mexico this summer, I was astounded by the shots Fede was getting using this very lens on a camera body that was similar to mine. 

The kit lens that came with my camera is too heavy and not versatile enough.  And it's also broken, ha!  Just a few months after the warranty ran out of course.  Canon wants $179 to fix it.  Rather than throw good money after bad, I think I should give the broken lens to Jack to tinker with and get this one (that comes with a six YEAR warranty) for just a little more.

 

Photography Class with Amy Tripple... $250

I adore this local photographer's work.  But her price is just too steep for me!  However, she also teaches parents how to get the same quality shots out of their own DSLR cameras that she gets from hers.  I've been itching to try out her Sweet Shots II class, and since I've got a new muse on the way...I think it's time!
 

 

Family Mural on Naperville's Century Walk...$3500

 

If I had this kind of money lying around to do something frivolous (but meaningful) with, I would love to have our family painted into the mural in our city's downtown.  So I told Marc if he got any crazy ideas about diamonds or a new car, THIS is what I'd want instead.

 

It's so magical to watch the artists work, first penciling in each face, then brushing it on in sepia tones, and finally laying down the colors that make it come to life. 

 

I don't think we'll be in Naperville forever, but it sure would be amazing to have our images here for the long haul, to remember what a special time this was in our family's journey and to have something to visit and revisit as our adventure grows into new directions.

 

So there you have it! 

THE BIG WISH LIST 

It was even kind of fun to put together!

Now if only I could convince everyone else in my life to do the same,

gift-buying would be so much easier!

The Big Reveal!!

Sorry, not GENDER reveal, lol!  

Going to have to wait for January for that!

 

This reveal is a big surprise we've been keeping from the kids since the summer.  Everyone talks about going on a "babymoon", like a honeymoon before the baby arrives.  One last hurrah (well, as much as a pregnant mama-to-be can hurrah) for the expectant couple before their lives become a blur of diapers and round the clock feedings.

 

With three kids already in the house, we're kind of over that idea...not that we were ever into it to begin with.  I think I joined Marc on a 3 day business trip to Florida when Jack was on the way, but only because it worked out that way, not because we're big proponents of the "Me Time" mentality.

 

But this time around, we are actually in a particular ZONE that needed to be taken advantage of. 

 

The DIAPER FREE ZONE! 

 

For the first time in ten years, we are 100% out of diapers and pull ups.  And there's only 14 more weeks until we enter back into diaperland for the next few years, so we need to make the most of it!

 

We decided to do something crazy and whisk the kids away on vacation to someplace really special.

 

But we've been parents long enough to know that telling your children that something exciting is going to happen A VERY LONG TIME FROM NOW is a form of self-torture akin to "arewethereyet?" syndrome.  So we've been keeping this secret, waiting until the perfect, almost last moment to reveal the surprise.  (because we have two in school, we can't just whisk them away completely unannounced, but a few days notice should be enough to get their things in order!)

 

We told them at the end of a family/maternity photo shoot yesterday. 

It was freezing, and they were all troopers, waiting for the big prize we'd promised them if they behaved well.  They asked and begged for us to tell them what it was, and I let it slip that it was 'almost as good as a puppy', but that was all.  They were totally amped up, and so were the grownups, who had been waiting so long to see the suprise on their faces!

Many thanks to Auntie Ulia for being our videographer!

 

 

 

 Sorry for the jump cut...the big finale is just ahead! 

 

 

 

They needed it spelled out a little before they finally got it

(particularly Jack, who was lessthanthrilled with his hat)

but it's true,
we're going to Disney World!  

Thank goodness we have one child who shall remain Molly,
I mean nameless who responded enthusiastically! 
Even though she thinks she's going to see Justin Bieber at Disney World (huh?).

 

There may even be a few more surprises up our sleeves, so stay tuned!

WDW 2012 FULL STEAM AHEAD!

Weight Loss Tips and Tricks

My sister-in-law Jodi is a fitness coach – she posted this on her Facebook page the other day and it’s pretty much the attitude I adopted back at Christmastime ...

 

 

“There is no TRYING. 

You either DO IT, or you DON’T. Pick a path. 

It’s your CHOICE!”

I gave myself January-April to stop trying to get pregnant, and give 110% of my effort to losing the weight that was holding me back. The key for me, and something I realized back when I dropped the first 25 pounds before we moved to Illinois, is that when I exercise (even a little bit) I get so hungry that I destroy any chance I have of eating my target number of calories. I simply do not have the willpower to do it.

 

 

So I used a supplement called Slimquick - pills that you take during the day, that are supposed to do many things to help women lose weight, but for me, the #1 thing was appetite suppression!! When I could keep myself from being hungry and stay ahead of my appetite, I could avoid sabotaging myself. It was kind of like when I used the Nicoderm to quit smoking - I had to do the work, but the product gave me the edge to do it.

 

 

Once I started, my keys to success were;

 

 

1. Staying ahead of the hunger beast!

 

By eating something healthy and low calorie the SECOND I felt hungry (instead of trying to hold off until later and just tough it out) I avoided overeating when my hunger got the best of me or worse, grabbing something unhealthy because I was starving.

 

Some of my favorite quick snacks are

- carrots, zucchini slices or Crunchmaster crackers with hummus

- pretzels with a low-cal veggie dip made with greek yogurt

- popcorn with whatever seasoning I’ve been craving (salty, sweet, ranch, etc.)

 

Having those go-to snacks always available made a huge difference for me.

2. Always fill up on the good stuff first!

 

Veggies are like free calories, so I’d eat as many of them as I could stomach (which wasn't too hard because I actually like them to begin with).

 

I started each day with a smoothie adapted from a recipe my friend Gwen taught me. 

 

 

 

Baby spinach or kale

+ 1cup diet cranberry juice

+ half an avocado

+ whatever fruit I had around

= A GREAT START!

 

For very few calories, I could consume all of my day’s fruit and veggies before breakfast! Then when I did have breakfast, later in the morning, I’d make an egg white omelet with any veggies I had leftover from dinner the night before plus a sprinkle of low fat cheese. The whole dish is high protein/low carb, but because of the cheese it tastes decadent, not like you’re shortchanging yourself.

 

At lunch, I’d always start with soup or a salad and fill up on that before I went for the higher calorie sandwich I was really craving. Then by the time I got around to making a sandwich, I only needed half, or sometimes I didn’t need it at all!

3. Skimp on dinner as often as possible.

 

I grew up with dinner being the biggest meal of the day, but now I know that keeping the balance of my calories earlier in the day (when I'm using energy to burn them) is a better option.  When I could eat a salad or a frozen lean cuisine for dinner instead of whatever the family was eating, I knew I was shaving hundreds of calories off my daily intake.

 

When I did eat what the family was eating, I’d eat the protein, double or triple my veggies and skip the carbs/starches, or only have a little bit.  You'd be surprised how satisfying a bowl of haricots with spaghetti sauce can be instead of the gobs of pasta the family is eating!

4. Substitute low calorie preparations for high calorie ones

 

This means Pam instead of butter/olive oil, plain yogurt instead of mayo, milk instead of cream (but not in my coffee! no one better mess with my coffee!) mashed potatoes that are really half cauliflower, baked potatoes instead of french fries, etc.

5. No food after 7pm. PERIOD. And an early bedtime!

 

This one was by far the hardest. I’ve never been able to not snack at night. I’m a night owl, and the way I would stay up is to fuel myself with an extra meal at midnight. So I had to radically change my nighttime habits. I had to put the kids to bed, kiss Marc and the house goodnight (no more doing cleanup or projects or messing around on the internet until midnight!) and take a bath .and go to bed

 

My new bedtime ritual became a bath with a cup of tea.  I bought a CASE of gingerbread tea from Amazon.com, because with a little Truvia in it, it really tastes like dessert! I also have a case of sugar cookie tea for nights when I wanted something different, but it's a little weaker so I need to use two tea bags. Celestial Seasonings makes both, but they’re only available at Christmastime unless you go through Amazon.   The warm tea filled my tummy up and made me feel like I'd had something sweet and yummy to reward myself for a great day.

 

And then, no matter how hard it was, I would go to bed AND STAY THERE until I fell asleep. I’d read a little something uplifting, say my prayers and hope for the best.

 

Yes, my house was messier, I was less prepared for the next day, and I had to prioritize in a major way.  But being properly rested was such a game changer for me. Right off the top it cut out 300-500 calories a day from the lack of nighttime eating, but in addition to that, I woke up on a more even keel and could keep myself that way all day long. I was less shrill with the kids, less tired in the afternoon, and more able to keep my big mouth shut when food temptations were around instead of constantly craving that shot of sugar/carbs/caffeine I’d come to rely on.

5. Keep it simple

It’s important to find the recipes and meals that work for you and stick to them! Setting an end date was important for me, because it reminded me that this weight loss journey will not take forever, so losing out on a little variety in favor of saving my sanity was worth it.

6. CELEBRATE SUCCESS!!!

Knowing that I had 40-50lbs to lose at the beginning of this journey was almost too much for my brain to comprehend. It seemed an impossible task! But by focusing on short term goals that were stepping stones to my BIG goal, I celebrated along the way and kept myself motivated. I focused first on losing 5lbs. Then 10. Then another 10. And at each milestone I’d do something nice to reward myself – not a FOOD splurge, but maybe buying a new dress, or getting a pedicure, or some new makeup, or going out for a date night with Marc.

 

7. Lastly, KEEP TRACK!

 

I counted calories on the MyFitnessPal app on my iPhone. I tried to stick to 1200 a day, though many days I ended up closer to 1500.

In the end, you have to remind yourself that this ISN’T forever – you are NOT depriving yourself, in fact, you are actually TREATING yourself when you choose something healthy and good for your body instead of something that will cause you to feel depressed and self-loathing.

 

I always use the mind trick that “I can have that if I want, but AFTER I eat a salad”.

 

Because after I eat the salad, I won’t really WANT the bad thing. And even if I do, I’m already full, so a few bites will satisfy me. For example, I took the kids out to eat last weekend at a burger place that I’ve been DYING to try. But instead of ordering a burger, I ordered a salad. I KNEW that Ben would not finish his burger, and that I could sneak fries from all three of them, so I filled myself up on a tasty salad first, drank two large waters, and then as dessert, ate Ben’s remaining burger and ten or twelve fries. And I did not feel one bit deprived! Sure I would have loved to eat a huge burger with a fried egg, bacon, avocado and a little wasabi sauce on top...but it’s more important to me to not go back to my old ways because I’m SOCLOSE to my goal.

 

For anyone else thinking about taking on a weight loss goal, I'd recommend thinking about the answers to these questions, because just saying "Tomorrow will be different - I just won't eat!" has very little chance of success (trust me, I tried that method for YEARS!)

 

• How are you going to nurture your body with good food?
• Do you have an exercise plan?
• What are the pitfalls you need solutions for so you don’t sabotage yourself?
• What are your mini-goals?  
• What can you think of to motivate yourself when you're not feeling up to the challenge?
• How will you track your daily progress?
• How will you celebrate your success?

 

It’s not easy, but it’s SO rewarding.  Having people tell me how great I look is awesome, but even better is feeling FABULOUS and full of energy, looking in the mirror and seeing 'myself' for the first time in years (rather than the bloated imposter in my 'before pictures'), trying on clothes in sizes I haven't seen in half a decade (and bringing my old favorites out of hibernation) and knowing that I'm doing the very best I can to live a long, healthy, happy life.

 

Seeing some of my relatives with failing health in their fifties and sixties has made me even more resolute that I want a better quality of life (especially since my youngest wont be out of college then!)  Granted, anyone can get stricken with disease, or have a tragic accident...but personal choice is the one thing I can control in the paradigm so doggone it, that's what I'm gonna do!

 

And just as much as taking care of myself physically, I am realizing how important it is to keep my mental health in check. If I’m miserable and self-loathing and constantly beating myself up, then I’m setting myself up to waste the precious time I have in life.

I still have the tendency to look at other people and mentally kick myself for not managing to look as good/run as fast/be as skinny/eat as well as they do. But just as quickly, I can now correct myself with positive thoughts of what I am doing to create the best life for *ME*.

 

Not for looks (though that's not a bad side benefit)

but for lifelong health and happiness.

 

You only get to journey through this life once.
 It's just too precious to waste being miserable!

Molly Got Her Hair Cut!

She'd been after me all summer to chop it off like her friend Gretchen at school, nevermind that this is exactly how we used to have it cut, until she decided she needed a ponytail like cousin Peyton.  So for four long years we've grown it out...into a giant bushy mess of tangles that drives us both nuts.

 

I really had no argument other than "can we wait until after family pictures in August so that if you (I) hate it you (I) don't have to look at it for eternity in the giant wall canvas I plan to buy?"

 

Once we got home from Cape Cod, it was time!

 

 

There it is!

 

 

And there it goes!

 

 

That's a whole lotta hair to say goodbye to. 

 Sadly, it wasn't enought to donate to Locks of Love - they wanted 10", and we only had 6.

 

 

I may or may not have snatched some up in an envelope for posterity.

 

 

Almost done!

 

 

Just a final trim with the clippers!

 

 

TAH-DAH!!!!

 

 



 



 

 

Someone  was pretty pleased with the outcome!

On Brick Walls and Breakthroughs

As I mentioned in our summer recap, I lost some weight!
 Actually, that's the incredibly abridged summary to the story of the story about...

"How I conquered my life's greatest vice (smoking) only to gain a new one (eating) that seemed equally impossible to conquer, until I finally (mostly) found success after much agony, despair, perserverence, and gnashing of teeth."

And here, of course,
 (because it it's me here, and let's face it, I may have a tendency toward verbosity)
is the not so short story....

My entire adult life I've weighed between 105lbs (my wedding weight) and 125lbs (my 'egads I'm fat!' weight).  My body was happy to be 125, and I was able to maintain that quite easily throughout my twenties and early thirties.  However, I preferred to weigh 115 pounds, so there was always the constant battle of the ten pounds.  Like Bridget Jones in her diary, I'd gain and lose 200lbs a year, in 2 pound increments.  Up two, down two.  Up one, down three.  Up three, down two.  And so on.

Then I did something I never thought I'd be able to do.  For Molly's first birthday, I quit smoking.  FOR GOOD. 
Not a puff of smoke has passed these lips since June 10, 2006! 
Go me!

I wanted to be healthy, so at the same time I quit smoking, I switched to a whole foods diet.  Kicked out the evil white bread, pasta, rice and sugar and replaced them with healthy, whole-grain alternatives.

Once I quit smoking, my appetite was INSATIABLE! Despite what I'd heard about your body being naturally satisfied by the goodness of whole foods, I simply could. not. stop. eating!  I was starving 24/7.  Apparently, this is what happens when you addict yourself to an appetite supressant (nicotine) at the tender age of 16. (this is also why I will string my children up by their toenails if I ever catch them smoking - I will NEVER let them abuse their bodies the way I did!)

The 30lbs I gained in the four months that followed were wickedly easy to put on.  And surprisingly IMPOSSIBLE to take off.  We'd been trying to get pregnant and I knew that, at 148lbs, my body was not happy.  And it told me so in negative pregnancy tests as month after month went by with no baby on the horizon.

 

I tried Jenny Craig....FAIL.

I tried Weight Watchers...FAIL.
I tried my old buddy the Atkins Diet...FAIL!

The programs can work, don't get me wrong.  But they didn't work for me  because they couldn't tame my appetite!  My attempts to starve myself were futile.  After quitting smoking, I simply had no willpower left.

Over the course of a few months, I did manage to eek off a few pounds to get myself to 135lbs, the weight at which my body snapped to attention and we found out we were expecting!  Ben was born November 12, 2007 and in my postpartum hormone glow, I thought that I'd get right back on the bandwagon to getting my old body back.

HA!

I spent every day in AGONY as my size 8 pants strangled my midsection.  I finally realized that more than a weight adjustment, I needed an attitude adjustment and a perspective adjustment.  I could choose comfort and happiness and make peace with my new body...or I could keep slamming my head into a brick wall by fighting and failing the weight loss battle.

I chose the former and bought myself some size 10s.  And I actually felt GOOD for the first time in a long time.  I am convinced that having clothes that fit and flatter you, no matter your size, is crucial to eliminating the self-loathing that comes with feeling like a failure at the weight loss game.

But before I knew it, and without changing my diet, my 10s became 12s.  And then one day my 12s were too tight, and I had to go out and buy my first pair of size 14 pants. I was 150 pounds and honestly, I felt pretty happy with myself.  I was chubby, and cute, and well dressed, and blessed beyond belief in everything but thin-ness.  I was enjoying my life, and my kids, and my husband and my friends, and my hobbies.  And I was able to put the weight out of my mind with the feeling that

 

"This is a battle I am going to win, but I can't win it right now, so I'm not going to waste my precious time, energy and sanity to fight it, right now."

Right about then, my brother became engaged to the love of his life, and in January, 2008, we all traveled to Chicago to celebrate their marriage.  I had a great new dress, the kids were adorable, Marc was dashing and the wedding was gloriously beautiful.

 

It wasn't until a week or two later when I saw myself in the pictures, and GASPED!

WHO IS THAT????!!!

THAT CAN NOT BE ME!

I don't look like that!

That looks like a bloated, marshmallow stay-puft version of me!

How, HOW can that be ME??!

(and also, isn't that the cutest one year old you ever saw?!)

Something had to be done.  And fast, because my sister had gotten engaged to the love of HER life, and their wedding was four months away. 

 

So I went ALL IN.  Gave it everything I had.  Hired a personal trainer that cost a fortune.  Organized babysitters for every day of the week.  Got up at 5:30am every day to work out at bootcamp, then added in a personal training session three times a week.  Then did daily high-intensity-interval workouts at home.  On top of this, I stuck to my trainer's eating plan, which consisted of roughly 35 foods that I could eat, none of which were allowed to be microwaved, none of which were carbs, and none of which were processed.  And no caffeine.

 

Six weeks passed with me following this plan to a T.

I was PERFECT.  I did everything exactly as required, including not weighing myself AT ALL for the entire six weeks.  Every afternoon I would fall asleep face down on the floor as my kids watched Nickelodeon because I was so exhausted from the effort.

 

By the end of the six weeks, I could flip a 350lb tire six times across the room.

I could sprint a quarter mile with a 100lb sled strapped to my back.

Box jump half my height.

Chop vegetables in my sleep.

And did I mention I trained for, and ran, a 5k in the middle of this?

 

And when the day came to weigh in, I'd lost...

 

 

 

 

(drumroll please!)

 

 

 

 

 

five pounds.

 

 

 

Oh yes, you read that right!

 

FIVE.

 

POUNDS.

 

Now you may think in your head what so many people said to me which is
"Muscle weighs more than fat so you really have to look at your INCHES to know how much better off you are.  How many sizes did you lose?"

 

The short answer? 

 None. 

All of my clothes still fit, I could just juggle boulders while wearing them with my newfound superstrength.

 

My thoughts? 
Honestly?

"If I have to work THIS HARD to be thin.....then I'd rather be fat."

 

So I was, doggoneit!

I gave up the training.

I ate what I wanted.

I enjoyed my life.

 

And eventually, my weight climbed to

170 pounds.

 

UH OH.

 

Something had to give - because at this weight, I was going to be on the Biggest Loser in no time.

I tried Weight Watchers again.

FAIL.

Atkins Diet, again.

FAIL.

Counting Calories.

FAIL.

 

With nothing left to fail at...I went to the diet supplement aisle at Target.

I picked up a bottle of this...

 

 

And I stopped being hungry.

 

And I lost 25 pounds.

 

In 12 weeks.

 

After SO MUCH FAILURE? 

Success felt pretty sweet.

 

REALLY SWEET.

 

AWESOMELY SWEET!!

 

And then we moved across country, got busy unpacking, and when we were unpacked, got to work on having another baby.

 

But at 145 pounds, we were up against the same brick wall as before.

Months went by...then a year, with nothing but negative pregnancy tests to show for it.

 

As Fall 2012 dawned, I joined a group of friends striving for a healthier lifestyle and weight loss.  We were going to support each other and motivate each other to make good on our promises to ourselves.

I took up bike riding and started making healthier choices in what I ate.

I was CONSTANTLY on my bike.

I ate/drank more vegetables and fruits than I could imagine.

 

Did I lose any weight? 

Not an ounce.

But you could bounce quarters off my quads they were so ripped, and eventually, they began to stretch my jeans to capacity.  I could barely pull them on anymore.

 

FAIL #17.

 

As Christmas approached, it dawned on me...

I'm turning FORTY in October. 

Forty had always been my personal cutoff for baby making.

At this rate, there was a good chance that I was going to be

 

FORTY

and

OVERWEIGHT

and

NOT PREGNANT.

 

I had loads of people in my life giving me advice.

But I'd tried to do things "their" way

(the "they" in quotation marks being the prevailing wisdom of the fitness industry and it's followers).

 

And all I got was failure.

 

I considered adding Slimquick back in, but it's not safe to take while trying to concieve. 

I had to make a choice.

 

My friend Slimquick came back into the picture.

Along with a new buddy named MyFitnessPal.

 

Because I had to give up the quest to get pregnant while taking the supplement, I gave myself an end date.  We were going to Las Vegas in April.  Whatever weight I was going to lose had to be lost by then, because every month that passed by was a month I had to kiss goodbye the dream of having a fourth child in our lives.

 

January passed.

February.

March

and

finally April.

 

And 25 pounds were gone!!!!

 

I was five pounds from my ultimate goal of 125lbs

(How ironic that this was my previous "fat weight"! Ah, perspective, you are hilarious!)

 

And the rest, as they say, is history.

I stopped taking the supplement at the end of March

and we got pregnant in April in Las Vegas.

 

I've maintained a healthy weight since then, and am currently 140lbs and 23 weeks pregnant.

 

Through this whole, SIX YEAR ordeal, I have learned

 

HUMILITY

as I had to submit to failure after failure, realizing that hard work and smart choices sometimes aren't enough to equal success.  Sometimes there's a lesson to be learned that only frustration and failure can teach.

 

EMPATHY

for anyone who ever had to fight this hard to overcome an obstacle in their lives,

be it weight or something else. 

I now understand why so many just give up. 

As painful as it is, sometimes giving up is the only thing you can do.

 

PERSERVERENCE

I learned that even though sometimes you need to give up,

there will eventually be a wave of renewed inspiration

that will give you the vigor to fight the good fight again.

 

SELF-CONTROL

Sometimes it doesn't come easy.  Sometimes you need help from an outside source to reign in your selfish instincts.  Because we all have them.  It boils down to the inability to choose discomfort NOW for a better outcome TOMORROW.  But I truly believe that the best things in life come from employing self-control, and that when we don't, we are not living up to the potential we have been given with the gift of life we have been blessed with.

 

So I choose to nourish my body with healthy foods instead of destroying it with junk.

 

I choose to bless my body with exercise instead of wasting it with sloth.

 

I choose to rest my body with an earlier bedtime

instead of the night-owl instincts that sap me of energy

and send me running toward sugar.

 

 

I'm okay with the way things have turned out, because I think it's refined me into a better, deeper thinking, more empathetic version of myself.  Today, my lungs and heart are nearly unrecognizable as those of a veteran smoker.  And if I continue making healthy choices and staying active, I think I'll be well on my way to living the life I imagine.

 

It's not always easy, but it's worth it!

 

 

 

 

21 Weeks and Counting!

Pregnancy induced insomnia has kicked in I'm afraid.  Frankly, how could ANYONE sleep when there are important thoughts to be thunk like,

 

"Should I use a pack and play or a porta crib on the first floor?

"Would the butler's pantry make a great changing table?"

"If I jogged and lifted weights every day, would I avoid gestational diabetes?"

"What about every other day?"
"Once a week?"
AND

"What are we going to NAME this little person now that we know SOMEONE who has named their child every name we ever put on a list, EVER?"

 

So I spend my evenings googling things like "Perfect sibling names for (insert name here)"

 

Tonight, I found some good evidence that we are at least on the right path. 

Because when I used the tools at babynamewizard.com

to look up sibling names for Charlie (among a few dozen others), this is what I got...

 

 

 

Note that ALL THREE Mallett kids' names are listed, and so is one of their middle names (Henry).

 

And while we're on the subject, KICK ME for ever using Henry as a middle name because HELLO?  Wouldn't that make the  perfect first name for a baby brother?  Don't even get me started on using Josephine as Molly's middle name....